I'm not sure that Tennessee is for me. When I originally moved down here, it was to get my divorce, and then move out west. That never happened because I got an amazing job. And I still love that job, but I feel like I'm missing out on some opportunity out west. May 1st marks the 2nd anniversary of obtaining my divorce (aka: My own personal Independence Day), and the social life is almost non-existent. (But I did say earlier that I wasn't going to talk about that here...) Either way though, I'm kind of over it.
And don't get me started on the crazy weather! The snow has been awful here this winter, and my crazy finger (right index) goes horribly numb in the cold. (Some friends have called it my vampire finger) because it gets scary numb and I have no idea why. And the storm we had last week was really freaky. Tornadoes touched down miles from me? Are you serious? Give me a tsunami or an earthquake instead. For real. I'm over that too.
Back in February, (probably why you've seen NO updates from me since January) I signed paperwork that puts a temporary withdrawal on my school. Don't get me wrong, I love school and love class, but that last class I took was VERY eye opening. Foundations of Counseling. It has taught me the more technical side of becoming a counselor in Tennessee, and I'm not sure if I like it. I have zero experience in the health care side of business, and I'm not so sure I want to start all over again. The time and money I'm investing into it seem absolutely crazy to me right now. CRAZY! I could take the time and classes and money and re-invest it into IT classes for me so I can get certified in IT land, and EASILY make double what I'm making here. Whereas, it might take me 5 years to get to that level as a counselor. I'm worried about burnout, counter-transference, and the fact that I have absolutely no experience with it. And I know school is supposed to fix that, but the program I'm in is specific to becoming a licensed counselor in TN, and I don't want that. It's not my dream.
I'm making a pro and con list, so far the pro list is much longer, but I hear California calling my name. I really do. I heard it 11 years ago too when I moved out there in 2000 shortly after I graduated. Only this time, I won't have my sister to rely on. I'll have a few friends, and a couple of old co-workers, but I'm very confident that I'll be able to build a new support system around me. Why wouldn't I be able to? I've done it each place I've lived... New co-workers, new church friends, good old California.
So, yeah... Just need to plan and carry out that plan. Kinda hopeful my co-workers don't read my blog... lol if they do, it may come as a shock... If I wanted it private, I wouldn't have posted this. So there may be backlash, but I can handle it. I'm saving up (thank you tax refund, and thank you school refund for withdrawing from the 2nd half of the semester) and I'm almost at my goal. I just need to purchase and install a trailer hitch, hitch wiring, and most likely purchase a trailer for all my stuff.
I'll probably spend a few weeks in Utah too... Head up to Yellowstone with the fam. Should be pretty fun. :) The best part, is that I feel really good about this decision. I'm happy about it. :)
12 comments:
Wow! A few major changes! Best with the next step!
You may have a condition/symptom/phenomenon. Check out Raynaud's Phenomenon.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raynaud's_phenomenon
Your feelings and mine seem to coincide on Tennessee. It was an OK place to live for a while, but never somewhere I wanted to stay.
And it does seem that the time for you is now -- go for it!!
We will miss you but you have to do what you have to do. Good luck and let me know if you need help!
Thanks Wendy! We'll see what happens!
Jamie, the hypochondriac in me says it's possible! But they don't look nearly that bad... at all! NEVER do they turn blue! YIkes!
Jan, yeah, totally! I don't feel like I can put roots down here! I'm totally going for it!
Thank you Sandy! I'll miss you guys too! But I can always come back for a visit!! :-D
A blog post!!!!
(yay)
Interestingly enough, both of your sisters want to know more about the numb finger thing. SO's fingers get bright red in the cold, and it's noticeable enough that in a group of 100+ elementary school students on stage, an audience member turned and asked me "What's wrong with your daughter's hands?"
I've been in cold weather for 9 years and it's taken me as many winters to come to the conclusion that maybe cold weather isn't 100% evil. So I truly sympathize with you.
And while you're buying hitching things, look into an open top trailer--they dismantle and store better.
http://www.chiltontrailers.com/products/utility-trailers/
I had the same reasons for dropping my psych major in college!!!!! We ll want to make a difference and feel like we have a serious passion for our jobs BUT sometimes doing wha we are good at and will provide for us is what we need to do. As for the move I AM SO FOR IT!!!! You need the scenery change..as long as you can afford it DO IT!!! BUt of course PRAY AND FAST first:) Love ya!!!
Do it, girl. Do it!!! If you feel the wind of change blowing through your, er, hair then just do it. I support it :) Good luck!
Good luck with all the changes!
Yaaay for you! I can hear Sheryl Crow singing now "A change, will do you Goood!" :D
Good for you!
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